Some things I learned on Routeburn…

A good lip balm can’t be rated highly enough.
The same goes for sunscreen- the sky is closer and the air purer here.
Very little tastes better than water running from a clean mountain stream.
Sometimes downhill all the way isn’t a good thing.
Undulating track means it goes up quickly, and down just as fast.
A steady climb usually involves rocks.
Relatively flat means just that- in comparison to the extremes of undulations and steady climbs.
Steep climb involves knee high boulders piled randomly to loosely represent (from a distance) stairs.
Spectacular views at the top is a significant understatement.
Likewise, so is challenging…especially when used by a guide.
Guide rails are there for a reason.
On a clear day, you really can see forever.
Walking poles save knees…and ankles…and are a saviour for people who blew their calf muscle four weeks ago.

Foot fleece is real, as are toe socks. Both are more valuable than you’d think.
There are more muscles in your legs than you ever learnt about in biology class- and all of them are capable of hurting at the same time.
Some views are expletive worthy- in a good way.
Some paths are expletive worthy- in a bad way.
In the rain, there really are a million different shades of green- and all of them are beautiful.

There are more words to describe green than you would imagine. Verdant is just one of them.
Mother Nature is a clever old bitch…and I mean that in the nicest possible way.
Lichen and moss come in more colours than you’d think possible.

Moss really is as soft as it looks.
Mud has the power to suck off your shoe.
Just because it’s summer doesn’t mean you can leave the beanies, gloves and thermals at home.
The gym does not in any way prepare you for the Routeburn Track- it just means you look slightly better at the back of the pack.
Road walking in suburbia does not in any way prepare you for the Routeburn Track- although it is more useful than the gym, and does help break in your boots.
It’s essential that you break in your boots.
The rest of the world and what they’re doing to each other doesn’t matter in the mountains.
It’s possible to survive for three days without cell reception, wifi and social media…just.
There is such a flower as an edelweiss and seeing one will make you want to sing.
I understand why Julie Andrews twirled around in a circle and did The Hills Are Alive thing.
When a group of people have sweated and toiled together, they will be able to find something in common.
I’m so so so glad that I did this with my friends.
Everyone’s “track” is different.
Some preconceptions are incorrect.
Some aren’t.
Bounding over a suspension bridge might very well have you whistling the theme song from Indiana Jones.
Canyoners are mad.

So are the runners who bound through this track as if they are mountain goats- hello…what about the scenery that you’re missing?
In this part of New Zealand there are no snakes.
I really want to emigrate.
The best soundtrack is birdsong.
Very little sounds more peaceful than the trickle of water.
If there’s a waterfall- no matter how big or small, I’ll take a photo of it.