what I know about…bucket lists…

Mooloolaba Beach at sunrise
Mooloolaba Beach at sunrise

Anyways, last night at the club we got talking about bucket lists.

My friend knows what I’m like so smiled in understanding as I went through mine. Her husband suggested that I add “renovate a house” to it- which I agreed with. Like on The Block- which I didn’t agree with.

My husband suggested that my bucket list wasn’t realistic. That I needed to bring it down a notch.

I told him that the whole point of bucket lists is not to be able to tick everything off.

My theory is that when you achieve everything you, well, stop.

My theory is that while you have something to hope for, to strive for, to look forward to, that you’re less likely to, well, stop.

Then he said, that he didn’t agree with most that was on my list.

Excuse me?

The other point of bucket lists is that other people don’t have to agree with it. That’s why the title on the top of that sheet of paper clearly reads My Bucket List. Mine. I’m not asking anyone to agree or even to commit to doing anything with me. I have no problems doing things on my own. Thankfully he knows that and, after 24 years together, gets our differences.

‘So what do you agree with?’ I asked, putting the emphasis on the agree.

‘The Northern Lights bit, the ride an elephant one and perhaps the whale one. Maybe even the horse one. We ticked off the hot air balloon. I think you need to be realistic on the rest,’ he said.

Realistic? Another point about bucket lists is they are, by nature, around 75% dream, 25% realism- the percentage can vary. And reality is one of those words I don’t like- similar to discipline, commitment and focus. None of these belong anywhere near a bucket list discussion.

‘Besides,’ he said, ‘I did 6 day hikes when I was in the Scouts.’ Ummm yes, in the bush out the back of Canberra.

My friend suggested that I could compromise on location.

‘We went camel riding on the Sunshine Coast at sunset,’ she said.

Fair point. Which brings me to another point about bucket lists- they can be subject to change at any time without notice. The owner reserves the right to add or alter said list.

‘What about the running 10kms?’ he asked. ‘That’s not anywhere on there and you used to say that you wanted to do that.’

‘I tried that and it didn’t work,’ I shook my head sadly at the remembered sense of failure, ‘so it’s been taken off the list.’

Here we have the only rule about bucket lists:

Any item brought out of the bucket and onto the table becomes a goal, and can never be put back in the bucket for another day.

If the running thing ever goes back in the bucket, it will go in under a different form- maybe something like compete in a half marathon or….actually, no, I can’t think of any possible re-wording of that one that could possibly mean it belongs back in the bucket.

What about you? Do you have rules about your bucket list? Would it worry you if your significant other had a different list?

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Author: Jo

Author, baker, sunrise chaser

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